Another Negative Critique

February 4, 2011: Now that my readership is increasing exponentially -- and I don't say that to brag; in fact, I'm more embarrassed about it than anyone -- my duty to produce (Did I say "produce," when I meant "grind out?") ongoing installments in this intellectual and moral morass I call my Blah-ugh! increases exponentially as well. (I know you people don't mean to pressure me, but clearly you do, and for that, I simultaneously love and despise you {which is not to say I wouldn't help you change a tire if it came down to that}.)

Anyway, I'm reminded how much easier it is to write about things that are bothering me, versus things I'm happy about. I may have once, perhaps a year ago, done an installment on the things I was grateful for, but I don't think it got me any new readers, nor a literary agent, nor any dates ... (In fact, the more I think of it, it might be prudent to go back and delete that entry and steer my full attention toward this bilious course that combines churlish criticisms and petty hostility; it seems to be what the public wants -- (at least my public -- this gaggle of jellybeans which seems to grow like a festering goiter).

But here, look at all these tangents I'm creating (as evidenced by my almost foolhardy use of excessive parentheses). I'd hoped to keep my point focused, like a dart, or an Englishman's nose, and instead I'm dissipating without even the tawdry pleasure of consuming alcohol.

What I wanted to discuss was how much easier -- more pleasurable and bountiful -- it is to write negatively. And don't we experience that in all aspects of our daily lives -- the joy of waxing negative? How often do we wander across an acquaintance at work, and before long there seems nothing else to talk about but something negative; if it's not criticizing an incompetent coworker or bemoaning our squalid working conditions, we bash the weather for all the wrongs its doing to us. We roil and rejoice in our roiling, like so many sick salamanders, or a Christian missionary.

But it seems to keep working, so I won't be the one to start criticizing it. Hell, I'm just happy to see my numbers increase. Maybe one day all this silly complaining will result in meaning (for me, I mean).

At the end of the day -- and please take this in the fond communal spirit in which it's intended -- it's really just all about me!