January 16, 2011: I'm hungry ... Which is in fact my best time to write. I invariably find that once I eat, the manic energy that serves me so well in the creative/craft process is soundly stilled once I eat, like the orange hot coals I pour water on late at night when it's time to kill the fire ...
So here I write, and on a vague whim, I thought I would finally give this Betsy Otter Thompson person a book review I said I might consider doing.
Now, for starters, you loyal readers know all-too-well that mine is not the kind of Blah-ugh! that reviews books, or does anything with any leaning toward seriousness, or anything to aid the community, or others. All in all, let's face it, it's really a shitty waste of time -- time that would be better spent by all of us picking up litter. So imagine my surprise when this madwoman sends me an email asking that I review her stupid book "Walking Through Illusion." I was at once flattered and incredibly annoyed. You see, as many of you know, I not only dread and fear my public -- Can you blame me? -- but I HATE (and here, see, I'm capitalizing the letters to emphasize my hate-ness) hate hate hate to be asked to read anything. I can't really explain why, but I just do. While I love to read overall, somehow anytime anyone specifically asks me to read something, it immediately becomes this awful, painful impossible-to-overcome burden. Perhaps it's a holdover from grammar school, where I was never a very motivated reader and basically experienced all reading as a reprehensible chore ...
So, that said, to Thompson's book ...
First off, you should know that I haven't read it, but I don't see where that doesn't qualify me to do a sound review -- probably one of more value than you'd find in any of those hack publications, like The NY Times. The crux of the book (or should I say calix, or crucifix, or some other quasi-religious pun I haven't the energy to create) is a Q & A with Jesus. (Yes, Jesus! Hay-sus Christy, as he's often referred to by some, and the Dark Lord, by others!) Anyway, this Thompson person has creatively concocted a sort of interview with the Big Cheese. (Well, then why don't you ask HIM to review it, huh honey?) It's broken into practical chapters that address spiritual topics, like Truth and Confusion. And it's got a lovely cover with a sort of orangey-yellow explosion.
The best thing I could say about this book, I'm sure, is that it's relatively short, and seemingly concise. If I know Jesus, he's a man of simple ideas, despite his long-windedness, and in her interviews Thompson seems to have kept his (or should I say His? Well, I won't!) inane rambling to a minimum. (Everyone knows Jesus tends to go off on tangents when he's interviewed.) All told, if you're even vaguely interested in things like Jesus and spiritual crap, this may be the book for you, but certainly don't blame me if it isn't; after all, I got my copy for free!
On a serious note (yeah, right), I must commend Thompson for even writing a book. Most of us just sit around on our asses sending text messages and masturbating to reality shows. But those brave, committed few -- meaning people like me -- devote their time to trying to make the world a better place through their writing. And while Thompson can't write anything like I can -- who, after all, could come close? -- I send her kudos in the form of this review.
Meanwhile, speaking of writing, you all should know that my second novel is complete. It's called "The Space Case," and it's the humorous story of a tweeked 30-something whose biological clock is winding down, and the outer space alien with whom she begins a very unusual relationship ... No. No, I'm not kidding!
Now, who the hell's going to review MY book?!!
i'd review it if i had it, but you sent it to someone else to read . . .
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