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Sunday, January 15, 2012

Praising Kevin Spacey ... and E.J. (Whoever HE is!)

January 15, 2012: I'd always loved Kevin Spacey -- that is, I was scared of him and thought that, perhaps if I became a fan, he'd leave me alone. But that all changed after seeing him do his Al Pacino impersonation at an event several years back -- (one of those astutely meaningless praise parties, in which an entertainer is hailed as a hero for his contributions to civilization, which in Pacino's case included birthing children after 60.) That's when Spacey won my heart.

Subsequently, I came to see his versatility -- and great humor -- in several different films. Who would have thought that this dangerous little man who seemed so demented in "Seven," would turn out to be a veritable cheer-pot of good giggles and positive tidings, or so I now like to think. Ultimately, it probably doesn't matter how evil he may really be in his heart, because I'm simply delighted to count him among my many loyal Blah-ugh! fans. (And YOU TOO, assuming you're reading this, and not just PRETENDING to read it so you'll be popular.) A great man, I tell you, is this Mr. Spacey, and his patronage is an affirmation of his good taste, if not his balanced temperament. Kudos, Mr. Spacey -- Kevin -- Kev ... K.S. ... Kissyface! ... Kudos, I say ...

And E.J. What else can we say about you? Nothing. You've had more than your share of attention, so stop pestering me and let Kevin have HIS moment in the sun ...

On another note, I'm beginning to suspect not everyone is being honest with me about their purchasing of SPACE CASE (my new humorous literary sci-fi ebook, available at Amazon and B&N). My numbers aren't reflecting the alleged enthusiasm of the horde, which once again thinks it can pull the wool over my eyes, like it did with that Kennedy assassination business. One woman told me her dog damaged her Kindle during some unnatural act, prohibiting her purchase. Another man claimed Jesus himself actually forbid him from buying SPACE CASE once he learned it was $2.99, which he said was a satanic price, given there were two typos. (If you find them, BTW, I'll send you an autographed picture of me and Kevin Spacey (although he's actually drawn in with a Sharpie marker).)

This, in turn, leads to a question I'm being asked quite a bit at this point -- namely, Who do I see playing Wendy and Rex in the movie version? I'd be lying if I said I hadn't given this a great deal of thought (for I'm prone to both success and self-pleasure fantasies). Still, I haven't settled on any one actor for each role, and I like the idea of keeping my options open. (Like Pacino.) I do know this, however -- if Kevin wants the part of Wendy OR Rex, it's his without auditioning. And if he'd prefer I change the title to SPACEY CASE, so be it.

Pacino, on the other hand, can have the part of the Visnodian chamber leader for the asking, and I'm hoping E.J. will consider a cameo as the 80-year-old incontinent mute gardener.

1 comment:

  1. i thought you put the period outside of the parenthesis . . .