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Sunday, September 9, 2012

Michael Enders Made My Day ... (and Of Course Sue Too!)

September 9, 2012:  I'm not sure who Michael Enders is, exactly -- and I certainly hope we're not old friends or something -- but he really just made my evening complete. You see, because I DON'T know who he is, and yet he was scrumptious enough to actually respond to my stupid Blah-ugh!, I am just overjoyed and am now motivating myself to write another one of these stupid entries ...

Thank you, Michael Enders -- or CURSE you, as I'm sure some readers are thinking -- those of you who keep waiting for me to die, keep hoping this will be the LAST entry and that you can chuckle your disconcerting snortle and say, "See! I knew he'd eventually die an evil death owing to his overt anti-everything-ism ... Dirty bastard!"

Anyway, enough about Michael Enders. I don't know who the hell he is or what he wants from me, except he seemed to have some interesting insights, or he made a good joke or something. I don't even remember now. I just want you all to love him as much as I do at this moment, or did in the last moment ...

Okay, so, the next issue is WHY I got hit in the eye so much today. It's very odd. My left eye in particular. The first time was at my daughter's softball practice this afternoon, and let me tell you this big gold-yellow ball skipped right off the homeplate and shot right into my left prescription sunglass. "Ouch!" I said, and then proceeded to vehemently posture this way and that to make it clear I was hurt. (No one seemed that concerned, so I just stopped.)

Then, as if this wasn't enough abuse, I got a splash of this new clumping cat litter in that very same eye later this night. I mean, the coincidence was maddening. And imagine my shocked disappointed pissed-offedness when, after FINALLY buying the "clumping" kind of litter instead of the cheapest generic clay brand, which quickly turns into ammonia and very well may have burned my lungs out from cleaning it -- and god knows what it's doing to those stupid cats -- I finally, FINALLY get this expensive box of clumping crap ... And here I am opening -- struggling to open -- this stupid fancy-schmancy designer box, having to push in this stupid fancy-schmancy opening, when POP!!! A veritable hailstorm of tiny rocks shoots out of that opening like so many asteroids bound for a doomed and endangered planet -- earth possibly, or Krypton.

I worry about my eyes, now and again anyway. I like my eyes, even though I have froglike lids and my eyebrows have been deforming in later life ...

The point is, I WILL be appearing at the New Haven Public Library on Thursday, I think at 6pm, to talk about SPACE CASE and e-publishing and e-publishing SPACE CASE, and why it has so many typos, and why my eyebrows look so funny these days ...

The irony is that I think it's actually called the New Haven "Free" Library, and yet you're going to be charged an admission price if you come. Come if you can, but be ready to pay, and perhaps more than with your life, which I won't refund, no matter how much you try to sweet talk me ...

Stick with me, folks! I'll have you regretting your Internet connection in no time ...

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